Saturday, October 29, 2005
CoNdEmNeD
yay tonight gt time to blog again... so i shall...
today is quite an unpleasant day for me... nt that i kena bad luck of got into trouble... bt cos i witnessed unpleasant things...
during the start of my stay in 'school', i thought that i was the only one who was sort of being 'marked' by the class for being erm... outstanding... but how wrong i was... as time goes by, i managed to get along with the class and managed to finally do my job as IC properly... but last week, i heard some unpleasant things about... OTHER people...
i 1st heard of it in the workshop... that my 2-IC is quite unpopular in class... i didnt notice it... cos he's sort of low profile... den no one said anything v obvious... until that day at the workshop, we were slacking ard... den i heard the others toking bad abt ppl... they used terms which isnt very comprehensive if one nvr listen properly... i suspected they were toking abt him... but i felt that it was nothing serious... that they were jus joking... cos they were saying the same thing about another guy... who was in fact, among the gang of gossipers themselves... and the way they speak is like joking likedat, so i felt that it might jus be me who was oversensitive...
but through the week, it became more and more obvious... yesterday my SSG told him that his hair was long... and suggest he cuts it a.s.a.p. ... so today he came to sch wif his 'new hairstyle'... and trust me... IT WAS EXTREMELY OUTSTANDINGLY... U**Y... the back portion of his hair was like 'shaved off'... and he didnt make slope... so it was like... suddenly the hair stop there tat kinda effect... i didnt noe why he nvr bother to do a proper touch up... but anyway, personally, i didnt bother much abt his hair... though its stupid... bt none o my business mah... so y i care so much right? but the others were kinda annoyed... nt by his hairstyle... bt by the image he portrayed about himself...
during lunch break when he wasnt ard, 80-90% of the class was like toking ill about him... laughing abt him... making jokes of him... though i did add my own 2-cents to their topic, which might haf added abit of spice to the topic? hmm... bt my intention wasnt to sabo him... jus to chit chat only... bt somehow, i feel sad... is it pity? i dunno...
my 2-IC and i haf lunch together everyday... since the start of school... i didnt find anything wrong wif him...the way he speaks is ok... the way he behaves too... but as time goes by, i gt a little annoyed by him... cos every lunch break he'll borrow my n-gage to play games... if once or twice is ok... but everyday... abit guo fen right? i haf fone like no haf likedat... den some ppl will haf an uneasy feeling when their fones aint ard... im one of them... thats y i abit annoyed... but one thing abt him which i dunno is gd or bad, is tat he quite... willing to take up leadership roles... in fact, he WANTS to... every morning and evening we haf to fall in and fall out... den usually is the IC who stands in front of everyone and gif wadever commands necessary... so... yeah... i was the ic mah... so i haf to do the basic stuff... den my 2-IC was like... hinting that he wants to be the guy standing in front... dunno y lah... maybe the feeling v shiok or something? (ok i admit... at first the feeling lagi shiok... like commanding a whole lot of troops liekdat... bt as time goes by... sian one u noe... den anything u screw up... sia sway urself one...) yah so at first i didnt quite agree to it... but later when i become abit sick of standing in front, den... wadever lah... he so 'gi-an'... let u do lor... so... is like he help me cover my sai kang likedat lah... the feeling v wierd... like song and bui song at the same time. dunno lah. anwyay he v willing to do all the IC sai kang... like return keys... sign out this sign out that... v sian one... he like... let him do lor... make my job easier only... y not right... haha...
but these reasons isnt enough to make me condemn him... so i decided to find out why the others condemn him so much... and if possible, i wanna help him... cos he's my fren afterall wad right... it seems like the others noted the following:
1) he makes simple things complex. (which happens to me too sometimes)
2) he doesnt seem to care hw he appear in front of others... (hair... HAIR!!!)
3) one guy who used to be his classmate finds him v hao lian... (i shall nt touch that part... cos i nvr witness... so cannot jus anyhow believe wad others say...)
4) some of his comments... i dunno... i find it abit nasty (ok i say nasty things too... his level of hostility cannot match mine... muahaha...)
5) his KO duties was kinda... half-fcuked... he didnt finish wad he was supposed to do... (i haf to agree to this. i cannot tolerate half-fcuked jobs... but yest. gt lots of big shots ard... so its understandable he cant finish it yesterday... but wad i cannot tolerate is, he nvr seem to show any assertiveness and initiative in completing his leftover-job today and intends to let the next guy doing the duties to finish his stuff for him... this is unacceptable. i didnt find out abt this until the guy doing duties today complained and demanded he finish his job...making mistakes is ok... hope he doesnt repeat them.)
and other small small things he does that pissed e others off...
like my fren said... such stuff is something we cannot help wif... cos its his personality... his character... he has to realise these issues himself... and eventually, find a way to get along wif the others...i been through such things before... i can understand how it feels like to be condemned... i want to help him... but... i dunno how to tell him... i dun even noe if he noes that ppl dislike him anot... for me, i realised my faults on my own... and it took me years before i realised them... how long will HE take to realise his mistakes too?? wad can i do to help? anyone haf any suggestions? or shud i jus ignore the whole thing altogether... let him realise these issues himself?
y i so kpo... y y y y y y
sian hor? haha... dun think dun think!!! concentrate on exam... if fail... take sub paper... fail again... ARMY life. dun wan tat... must pass... must study... wish me good luck ppl... hope i make it on my 1st attempt...
potato
12:21 AM
