Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Bitching Again~
I've changed my blog address... Even though I know that the handful of people who reads my blog are mostly people I can trust, I still feel that some thoughts of mine are better left unknown. However, I believe that friends who know me well enough will still find this place sooner or later, if they bother to search... Just hope that they wont reveal the address.
I was really stunned by the URL Angelin posted to me: It was a You-Tube video clip of SG Kopitiam during the Pitstop outing! And she asked if the person inside was me... It really was damn amazing how she could figure out its me because the clip was pretty low quality and my face was revealed no more than 3 seconds! Damn impressed...
One old man stopped pestering me and boss... Now another old man and an old woman is on our tail. Why do people never stop attempting to track us down and throw us into the lion's pit? Its so irritating ya? Isn't it so that as long as we finish assignments given to us, we should be given the freedom we deserve? I don't see why you should be jealous of our achievements... You had the chance to prove yourself... Now that we had shown our worth, you want to play punk with us? You really are a shameless old hag... I don't care how old you are, how senior you are, weather you're a male or female... But such behaviour is despicable and unacceptable in my context. If you have the spare time and energy to do such bo liao things, why don't you use that energy and time to try to improve your own work? If you really want to score points, I think you'll be more proud and honourable if you really use your own talents and skills. Such meaningless games of hide and seek and lodging complaints is really childish and a waste of time... And I don't see how much points you can score through such means. And face it - one leg of yours is already stepping into the coffin... You should be thinking about how you're gonna retire... Such games are not for people your age... You're too old to qualify... And if you're thinking about promotions, I think even Aladin's Genie will have a problem fulfilling that wish.
I guess I had long expected my workcentre to be such a dark and sinister place... But still, I wish to shout out loud if I have the chance... It sucks to bottle such anger... I should buy a punching bag man...
I really feel that serving NS is a good experience for me. I've learnt abit how to judge people and find out what people want by listening to how they speak. This skill will be most useful in my carreer in future. I hope that the Auditor course that the staff in my workcentre will attend includes me as well... If I were to attend it, I will definitely be able to judge more accurately.
I still can't help being talkative. However, I'm starting to feel more and more like myself. Though I hate the feeling of not trusting anyone, I feel secure under this blanket of insecurity. Sounds contradicting? But that is how I feel - That anyone other than myself cannot be trusted... At least not 100%. I want to have that 'I'm the best. I'm above everyone. I'm the born leader.' kind of feeling back... But I think that to deserve the right to think that way, I would have to wait til I get good results in my future studies.
I hate it when friends borrow money from me. I don't mind borrowing, but I hate pestering them to return me the money. So far I had lent money to a few friends... And I really hate it when I'm short of money and end up have to pester them to return me so I could tide through my own financial difficulties. And apparently, borrowing is easier than getting the cash back. Even after asking back for the money, I haven received a single cent yet. Maybe its just me, but whenever I borrow money, I try my best to return A.S.A.P. even if it means I have to eat instant noodles for the whole month. I don't see this in most of my friends... Maybe I had too much confidence in them. Whatever... Next time I'm just gonna say I have no money...
To whoever reads this blog: This is a place where I bitch about unhappy things and laugh at things which makes me happy. If you don't like what you see, fuck off.
Apparantly, not a single day spent in the force is a happy one.
I'm looking forward to Good Friday. That is when 'Operation: Rebirth' officially begins! During the next 42 days, I will be undergoing my CIVILIAN CONVERSION COURSE! I will try to bring forward this Operation as much as I can... As for how this Operation is taking place, it will remain highly classified and made known only to my boss. Haha!
Fuck man. Is it so hard to find someone whom you like and likes you back as much? I'm really getting pissed at watching people basking themself in all that lovey-dovey bullshit while I'm still suffering alone... Hell yeah I'm jealous alright... So what? Its not like I didn't attempt to make things work... After undergoing all the trouble of making myself look better and more mature and all that shit, things are still not going well! What the fuck do I lack?! If its height, I can't do anything about it! Otherwise, I've tried everything I can... What the fuck more do I need to do?! Someone please fucking tell me! This really sucks man! I need someone to warm my heart... I sound so fucking patheic.........................
potato
8:31 PM
